A pretty productive weekend................

Now that the white trash (that would be us, receiving that title from my oldest when she saw that we duct taped the side mirror back on the car, which BTW worked really great in winter, not so hot is summer when the tape got hot, the sticky melted, and the mirror slid back into it broken position) on our street have gotten most of their front yard cleaned up, the neighborhood is looking pretty pretty. The last couple of years a couple of the houses had some sort of lawn disease and the homeowners spent the summer trying to get grass to grow (Grass is so over-rated...that is why we went with bricks), but this year everything is green and healthy looking. There is some kind of camaraderie that happens when you are out in the yard working along side the other homeowners. Except, of course for those die-hard grass guys (who have, in so many words, told me they think I am nuts for not having grass in the front)who cross w-a-y over the line and can't stand to be out-mowed.

One of them happens to be right next door to me (Poor thing)and for years there was another one across the street from him. The second guy moved a couple of years ago, taking the pressure off grass guy number one. Well, now that the grass disease seems to have been conquered, he has a new competitor, right next door to him.

The face off goes something like this...One of the two decide it is time to mow the lawn. You can put money (lots of money) on the fact that within ten minutes (given the fact that the other guy is home at the time) he will start his mower and be out there. Doesn't matter if he had just mowed. Doesn't matter if they have company (like guy #1 did yesterday). It is like watching Pavlov's dog experiment only with the sound of a lawnmower instead of a bell!

I find this very entertaining (doesn't take much to amuse me), and wish I could find a betting pool I could cash in on. I would be a rich, rich woman! Just because I don't understand the need for a perfectly manicured lawn, doesn't mean I can't be happy for them, and I am sure it isn't hurting the property value in the neighborhood. Wouldn't want them taking that position away from me now would I?

I ended up putting close to fourteen hours into the front yard over the weekend, and that doesn't include my youngest's two hours and the several hours (my) Mister put in. He didn't work as consistently as I did, because he got the fun job of checking on the OPs because I am a much more efficient weeder than he is (not to mention picky, so doing more myself means having to go over less that he did to get right, IE.. how I want it). I am estimating that another eight hours should finish up the job. The good news is the rubber wood chips we put down last year are doing a great job and there are very few weeds coming up. Once all the dead leaves and pine needles are removed (have a shared how MUCH I hate the neighbors pine tree? Thought so) I think it will be an easy up-keep this summer.

After doing the yard yesterday, and running a couple of miles, I got cleaned up and relaxed in front of TV to watch some of the shows that I taped last week.

One of the shows was the latest ER. Part of it was about a guy with Alzheimer's. His son is brought into the ER with congestive heart failure. They get hold of the father and he is in the room when his son dies. A bit later in the show they go in to tell the man they have found a place for him to stay (he had been living with the son and it is apparent that he can not live on his own) and the poor man has no memory of having just watched his son die. They tell him again, and a third time. Finally, the fourth time he begins to talk about needing to go home as his son will be worried about him, Luca begins to talk appropriately to him. He doesn't lie to the man, but focuses his words to comfort and reassure the man that his son wants the best for him and right now it is to go to this new place. The guy says something about the son being able to find him so they can have dinner together and Luca says something to the effect that he is sure the son will know where his father is. By this time I was cheering out loud. When dealing with someone with Alzheimer's, it is imperative that you enter their world not try to orient them to yours. The show demonstrated this beautifully, and we so need education on this subject.

And now the other lesson. If your parents are getting on in years are they prepared in the event something happens to you? In this story (which is often true in real life) the son was the guardian, DPA, everything, and there was no other family. Upon his death, the father was not only homeless, but penniless. The son's estate would be tied up in probate for a year, and in the meantime who was to look out for this man that could no longer look out for himself. The show had a parallel story about a young boy that ended up needing foster care and at one point the social worker made the statement, "It is easy to find foster care for a child, for the older man it is almost impossible." Those are the facts people. As a society we get that children can need to be taken care of or watched over if something happens to their family, but once we become adults it is just assumed (WRONGLY) that we will always be taking care of ourselves. It is believed that everyone is out there doing the things that need doing to assure they will be taken care of if the time comes. This father and son thought they had done so, but they didn't factor in the son's death.

Most of us do not want to think about death, specially ours or a loved ones, but I want you to consider that you are not doing anybody any favors by ignoring the fact that everyone dies, and not only when they have had a long happy life. If you happen to be an only child, make sure you find a second person to step in if you are unable to do so. If you are the sibling in charge, keep the others up to speed, and legally able to step in so mom and dad continue to have their needs met first and foremost. If you know a neighbor that is in need of help, risk being nosy and make sure they have things covered.

Turning fifty this fall, I can tell you first hand, old age (not that fifty is old, but wasn't I just going to the prom the other day?) creeps up on you and you don't see it coming. From talking with many clients I have learned that it is a very real possibility that one day you can manage your own shopping and laundry and then, just like that, you can't make it up and down stairs. Then, because none of us want to admit we need help, you spend all your energy covering up the facts and our needs go un-met. It is only the lucky ones that are "found out" before some negative event happens. Check on your loved ones, and get those legal papers in order...Theirs AND yours!

Okay! I'm stepping off the soap box now...enjoy your day!