Sunday, October 29, 2006

Life cycles on...............

At least for the moment, our sweet Cecil seems to be on the mend. I believe it to be a combination of love, being needed, and antibiotics. Whatever reason, I am glad.

Still not totally up to par, Cecil continued to preform his choosen job of offering comfort to our resident that passed away yesterday morning. I know that you might find this strange, but each time one of our past three residents was in the final days/hours of their lives, Cecil would go into their room and sit vigil. He was never intrusive, laying under their bed, or at the foot of their bed. Coming out to eat or potty, he would return to the death bed as soon as his needs were met. As in the previous two times, since yesterday morning he has been going about his usual business and has not been back into the room his beloved resident left when he went home to be with Jesus. Maybe once could be a coincidence, but three times? Animals are very instictual, and you will never convince me that Cecil didn't know exactly what he was doing. A hospice cat living among us, who would have thunk it?

Again I feel honored to be given the opportunity to assist a family through the death process, providing a peaceful environment in which they could create the experience they chose. Each death we have been a part of (that sounds strange, but you know what I mean) has been completely different in regards to process, and yet each one has been exactly what it needed to be for the people involved. Death, like life, is a dance in which one learns the steps as they go. There is no wrong dance steps, just different ones, each designed to support and comfort those involved. How great is that?

Friday, October 27, 2006

Passing on the word as promised.............

When I was in the emergancy room last week, they did a routine EKG to make sure my heart was okay. I don't really understand it, but the doctor told me some of my waves were not quite normal so I had to have a stress test to check things out. As if my day to day stresses are not enough to prove that my heart is just fine!

Anyway, the test was yesterday. When the doctor's office called, they told me to wear comfortable clothing. Well, when I think treadmill, I think running clothing, so that is what I wore. Because it is cold now, I had on two layers. When I went in to start the test, I told the guy that I needed to undress first. He replied that he hoped I wasn't planning to take everything off, and relaxed when he saw my shorts. The tank top I had on still made it hard for him to place his electodes so I said," Well I have on a sports bra if that would make it easier." Off with the tank top. It isn't that I am an exhibitionist or anything, but this was a clinical procedure, and I was used to wearing shorts and a sports bra back when I was on PTA school. The guy rewarded me by telling me I was the first ever patient to come so prepared for the test, and at the end of the test he jokingly told me that it would be great if I could pass on the word to others that a sports bra is a GREAT thing to wear if you ever have to have a treadmill stress test. Consider it done techy. I also told him that what he really needed to do was contact the doctor's offices and tell them to give the patient more detailed information as to proper attire, as what is comfortable to one could mean totally something else to someone else. We also had fun with the idea of them supplying the sports bras, coming to the conclusion that paper ones just wouldn't work, so they would have to send real ones out to the laundry with the rest of the linen. And, by the way, my test results were fine. They said for my age my working exercise rate was above average. How's that for an over achiever like me?

On another bright note, Cecil seems to be doing better this morning. He even pounced out of hiding this morning to scare my youngest, one of his favorite things to do, so she was cheered by this. Thank you for all of your prayers and kind thoughts for him.

Thursday, October 26, 2006


Our dear Cecil Kitty is a sick little cat and needs your prayers.

Cecil has always been an "I'll meet you on my terms" kind of cat, coming and going as he pleased. Towards the end of last week, (my) Mister noticed that he had lost a lot of weight and he began to hide behind the dryer. When we took him to the Vet he had lost four pounds. While this would be a drop in the bucket on me, for a cat it is significant. The vet sent us home with instructions to hand feed him and get a urine on him as she could find nothing wrong. I did point out that he had some kind of a wound on his neck, and when she looked at it she complimented me on the fact that I had shaved the area so it wouldn't get infected while healing. Problem was I had not touched his neck. By the time we noticed it, it was healing and the fur was growing back. This could only mean that someone had caught him and deliberately shaved him. How sick is that? We are wondering if the weight loss was brought on by his throat being too sore to swallow.

I will spare you the full details, but after a day of trying to get him to pee in a liter pan filled with foreign material that would not absorb the pee, we finally gave up. As soon as we put the regular liter down he made a bee-line for the pan and my youngest was able to catch it mid-streem and get the needed sample. Doesn't that remind you of the indignities we have all had to endure at the hands of the medical community? Poor thing.

At his check up last night, we discovered he has lost another pound, has some liver abnormalities (which could simply be from his decreased eating or more serious), and an infection. Now the poor thing has to have antibiotics shoved down his throat twice a day.

Since there is still no clear cut diagnosis as to what is wrong, the vet was giving us further options. I explained to her that we are not the kind of family that believes in the lastest medical advancements for pets. Does this make us some kind of monsters? When it comes to my own life, I am a firm believer of quality not quantity, and feel the same about my pets. Right now Cecil is not the free roaming cat that is his nature. If we let him roam, he hides ( he spenp all day yesterday under the freezer until my youngest came home and spotted some of his fur)and we can't find him to care for him. For this reason we have to trap him in a bedroom. When I go in to care for him, I don't get the sense that he is any great pain, but he is stressed and skitish, his little eyes begging me not to mess with him because he knows he can't get away.

So is it better to put him through a battery of tests to MAYBE find a problem that can be medically fixed? Or is it better to make him comfortable and let him live the rest of his life as he chooses, even if it is hiding away? I am not sure if there is one right answer to this question. Just as each of us should be able to decide how the end of our life is written, we as pet owners should be able to assist our pets in the way we feel is best for their temperment and nature, without guilt or remorse. What do you think? Posted by Picasa

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

My latest hissy fit.............

For you youngsters out there reading this, hissy fit is another term for temper tantrum. What? You're telling me that now that you are an adult you never have temper tantrums? Ya, right? Well, not to brag, but I do from time to time. Here is a re-cap of my latest one.

Last Sunday, my youngest was doing her laundry and ask me if I wanted her to throw in my dirty running clothes. I said sure, as long as she washed them on cold and didn't put them in the dryer. I then told (my) Mister if he happen to change the laundry from the washer to the dryer NOT to put my running clothes in the dryer. I know he heard me, because he answered, "ok."

You might have already guessed, but about an hour later I went downstairs to find my daughter folding my running clothes. When I inquired, she assured me that it wasn't her that put the clothes in the dryer. The rest of the conversation went something like this:

Me: (to Mister) Did you put the clothes in the dryer?

Mister: (In a proud "isn't it great that I helped out" voice) Ya. Why?

Me: Didn't I ask you not to put my running clothes in the dryer?

Mister: I didn't look at what was in the washer, I just put it in the dryer.

Me: In the seven years that we have been married, have I ever just randomly initiated a conversation about laundry?

Mister: Well, no, but...

Me: (interupting) Then doesn't it make sense that if I talked to you about laundry it would be in regards to the current load?

Mister: Yes, but...

Me (interupting again) Just leave me alone and don't talk to me, I'm mad at you.


Me: (about thirty seconds later) And I just threw your pillows on the floor, and I hope the dogs pee on them and ruins them for you.

The next morning, I got a very nice e-mail from (my) Mister saying he was sorry about drying my clothes and that he would replace anything that was ruined. That is the whole crux of the matter and why I got upset. My running clothes can't be replaced because of the memories they contain. Each piece reminds me of a special race or workout, or a special time with my daughter. When I don't feel like running, I can put on some of those clothes and get motivated to get my butt out and run. These clothes have become somewhat sacred objects as silly as that might sound. When (my) Mister put them in the dryer I felt like he was dis-honoring those memories. I know he didn't do it on purpose, but still...

Do any of you have sacred items like this that other people might think of as ordinary and replaceable? Please let me know what they are, and why they are sacred to you.

And by the way... I am no longer mad at (my) Mister (at least for the moment) and you will be happy to know the dogs did NOT pee on his pillows, so all is well that ends well... Right?

Monday, October 23, 2006

Here is a funny story for you.......................

I have always been proud of the fact that I really don't care how I look. I am all about what's on the inside. It's cheaper, quicker, and helps one to blend in, in a crowd. Right?

While I am big on skin care, the only make-up I own are the things that come in those "free gift with purchase" that Lancome has every so often. At that, most of it has never been open.

I am not kidding when I say ninty percent of my clothes are either hand-me-downs from my kids, T-shirts from races, or deals from the thrift store. I own two pair of jeans one was a cast off from a friend, and the other pair is eight years old. My daily uniform consists of a T-shirt and shorts, so that if I do get the opportunity to run I can do so on a momements notice. Having made the commitment to grow out my hair for locks of love, it is driving me nuts, so I pull it all back in a pony tail and ignore it the best I can. Doesn't paint a very attractive picture does it now.

When I started doing my in home business, I actally made a pact with myself that I would make an attempt at being more put together on the outside. After all, I was a business owner now, wasn't I? I think that lasted less than two weeks before brain convinced the rest of me that it wasn't that important. I share this background with you to make the rest of the story funnier.

Over the last week, I have had extra time on my hands, and for the first time in I can't remember when, I have actually been spending a good share of it on me! Talk about progress. One day, I was having some reflective/meditation time, and the notion that what I have been doing (to my body) is a total renovation/re-model. Like a house, I have been ripping various parts of me down to the studs so that I might fix any structural damage. If any of you have ever done a re-modeling project you know that this is the part that is the most important, as it is the foundation for everything that comes later, but it is also the part that doesn't really show. At this stage of the game, the place keeps getting worse as you uncover all the flaws, and set a good foundation. It isn't until the drywall is up and one is ready for paint and trim that people checking out the project notice much difference.

While I still have a few areas to address, a big part of me is ready for paint and trim. For this reason, I have been playing with make-up and digging out "grown-up" clothes that I haven't worn in eight or nine years. Maybe, because they didn't fit for many of those years. It has been fun, seeing people's reactions to the tiny bit of make-up I have been wearing. I get comments like, did you color your hair, lose weight, get contacts, but not one has said, "are you wearing make-up?" I think because it is assumed that all females over the age of twelve wear the stuff, plus I am very subtle with it.

As I told you, I went to the Hospice memorial this Saturday past. Not only did I have "real" clothes on, I also had on make-up, and my hair was down. I was a little late arriving, but that is another (funny) story for another day. I snuck into the church unsure where to go, and saw the hospice aide that works for me. I went up to her and whisperingly ask for direction. As she began to tell me, she did a double take and stopped mid-sentence to say, "Patty, I didn't recognize you!" This happen a total of three times. The last time, I was walking into the kitchen after the luncheon to say hello to the social worker. She turned, noticed me, and said, "Can I help you?" I replied, Ya! I need a hug." It was only when I spoke that she knew who I was and she said, "Patty! I thought you were a real person" (as opposed to being one of the hospice team, because that is how they have mostly come to think of me.)

Part of me wonders just how bad I USED to look, but not any part that really gets a vote. This is what I need to be doing for now. I have also told (my) Mister not to get too used to it, because he might just come home from work to find that I have rearranged myself back to the old shorts and no make-up me. That is the cool part of renovating, once you learn the basics you can keep changing things up over and over as the mood fits you. What will you decide to change up today?

Saturday, October 21, 2006

Early morning post.................

I have not had a sleepless night in some time, but I am just finishing up with one. I have two hours before I have to leave to do my breast cancer awareness walk, so I thought I would bring everyone up to speed on my world. Aren't you excited?

You may or may not know that in addition to October being Breast Cancer Awareness month, it is also National Physical Therapy Month. Even though I don't officially practice as a physical therapist assistant currently, I continue to try and stay connected to the profession.

To celebrate Physical therapy month, I contacted the hospice company that I work with and offered to do an in-service on transfers and range of motion for their staff. Since that is happening next week, I have been spending time preparing for the event. It has been a while since I have done any public speaking/service, and I am looking forward to it.

Got to share my cake story...............

A few weeks ago, I received an e-mail from a friend in which this guy was "searching for the person that baked that coconut cake at the Jana concert last year." My friend wrote, "Hey! This is you!" The concert was a benefit for the area hospice, and during intermission they had a bake sale to raise extra money. Well, on a whim, this guy bought my cake and took it with him to a wine tasting party the following evening. A year later he is again invited to the wine tasting, and the host says to him, "Any chance you could bring another one of those cakes?" OH YES! My head swelled so big I didn't know if it was going to fit through the door. And did I mention that he lives over an hour from my house? Okay, maybe not "world" famous, but at least county famous.

Anyway, we hooked up via e-mail and I told him I would be glad to make him another cake. He in turn donated to the breast cancer awareness walk/fundraiser. Earlier in the week, I kept telling myself that I had to dig out the recipe, and never managed to get beyond the thought. Well, Wednesday I went to the fridge to decide what to make for lunch, and there was a piece of paper laying on the floor. I picked it up to see what it was, and as you probably guessed it was the cake recipe. Sometimes I just can't believe how well my angels take care of me.

Coconut cake guy came this morning to pick up the cake, and brought his girlfriend (and adorable dog) with him. His girlfriend works in a senior care environment, and it was as if the two of us had known one another forever. Chat, chat, chatted away, until he finally told her they had to go. So, not only did I get an opportunity to bake for a good cause, but I feel like I have a new friend. Isn't that a great story?

So, after my night without sleep, I have a busy day ahead of me. First I have the three mile walk, and then I have the hospice memorial luncheon. This is a special event they hold every year to honor all of the loved ones they have cared for over the past year. Not having anyone currently on hospice I am looking forward to seeing the staff and catching up with them.

After that, I was going to go to a raw food cooking class, but I decided it best not to try and fit more in. In the evening, (my) Mister and I will be attending a fiftieth anniversary dinner for some wonderful friends of ours. It will be the first time in close to a year that the two of us have been out of the house at the same time. We are going to dress up and everything, just like a real date!

In our close social circle, I am the baby, and everyone else is seven to seventeen years older, with the honorary couple being the oldest. When I was about to marry (my) mister, lots of people gave me advice. I guess since it WAS my third marriage they had some kind of a right, right? Whether I wasn't listening to most of it, or have just forgotten, the one piece of advice I do recall I got was from the female part of the couple. She is a great seamstress, and was helping me make my wedding dress. As we were chatting she said to me, "Just remember... No one is perfect." To be honest, her words hurt my feelings at first. Not her intent at all! Knowing me as she did, and being a wise lady, she knew what high standards I held myself up to, and that I had a tendancy to do this with all of the people in my life. I think she was refering, not only to my soon to be husband not being perfect, but also that it was okay for me not to have to try so hard to be perfect. Over the years, when I am in the middle of having a meltdown over the latest thing not going perfectly, I have heard her words echo in my head and have been comforted by them. Okay, every once in a (great) while, I have even heard her words during a heated debate with (my) Mister and cut him a little (tiny) bit of slack.

Unless I am forgetting something, I think this should bring you all up to date for now. Hope you have a great day, as I am planning to do.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Finish Strong...............

Yesterday was a tough one, but I am much better today. Just when I have convinced myself that the stone must have passed, the pain begins again. I seem to have the nausea under control today, so that in itself is a huge improvement.

Still a little fuzzy, I thought I would post someone else's words instead of my own pros. I found this cleaning out my purse looking for something else that I didn't find. It is from my trail race (which was last June. That is how messy my purse was...) Since using it for race motivation, I have refered to it for other challenges, big and small. Hopefully you will find it as usefull as I do.


When the challenges become more difficult, that's your opportunity to become more determined. When the end of the race, the winner is the person who picks up the pace.

It's easy and common to start out strong. Real achievement comes to those who can also finish strong.

The doubts and challenges along the way can either drain your enthusiasm and commitment, or they can prompt you to grow stronger. When you choose to grow stronger, not only do you reach the goal, you also become more confident and effective in the process.

When you've gone this far, it pays to make the most of what you've already been through. Get maximum value from your efforts by finishing strong.

When the endeavor is nearing completion is when you can add the most discemible and enduring value. Finish strong and mike it something you can always look back upon with satisfaction.

Your efforts so far have created a powerful momentum, so continue to make the most of it. Finish strong and you'll be fully prepared for whatever is next.

- Ralph Marston

Sunday, October 15, 2006

I thought I knew pain until yesterday...................

Yesterday started like any other day, my early morning focus on getting a cup of coffee. While it was brewing, I went into check on a resident who had not been feeling well the night before. He had thrown up, so off to the shower we went. Problem was he was too weak to handle a shower so I cleaned him up best I could, and called the family to see how they wanted to handle things. Somewhere during this time, I noted a stitch in my left side, but put it out of my head to focus on caring for him. Family decided to transport him to the hospital instead of calling 911. By the time I got him into the van and on his way to the hospital, my stitch was a little worse, more like cramps when you have to go to the bathroom.

Again, I pushed it to the back of my mind and went about getting my other dependent resident dressed and fed. When she was half finished, the pain was getting worse, to the point of making me vomit. Those faint of heart stop reading.... I would give her a bite or two of food, try and lay down for a minute to reduce the pain, go in and be sick, and repeat the process until she was done. The only hurdle was getting her transfered into her (safe) recliner chair, but I managed to do this in spite of the doubleing over pain.

Two hours from the first sign of discomfort, I finally decided this was not going to get better on it's own. Remember (my) Mister was still on vacation and a good two hours from home. I started calling my other emergancy contacts, and couldn't get anyone on the phone. Then I started calling anyone whos number was in my memory and leaving messages. I finally called (my) Mister and told him he needed to get home, I was calling 911. By this time, the pain was so bad that I could hardly talk, so I am sure I freaked him out by not giving him better details. I called one of my resident's son, and thank God he was home and said he would be right over. Then I called 911, and managed to state my need for an ambulance and a police officer to watch over the OPs until help arrived.

The EMTs showed up about three minutes later (I was pretty impressed with that) and between retching and trying to breath through the pain they took a quick history and got me loaded in the ambulance.

Being a therapist, I have used the pain scale hundreds of times to ask someone about their pain, but it had never been an issue for me personally. When the nice EMT stated that he guessed my pain was a 10 (0 being the least 10 being the worst) I gaspt out that it was more like 25! He got on the radio and got permission to give me morphine for the pain. All this did was make my head fill funny, and didn't touch the pain at all.

By focusing on my breath, I was holding it together somewhat, and finally made it to the hospital, you know, the place with the good drugs. They got me into a cubicle, and the nurse informed me they couldn't give me anything until a doctor saw me and there were two people ahead of me. In retrospect, that was just mean. That was one of those situations in which a kind lie is called for. It is not like I was really aware of time, and had she told me a doctor would be right in I know I would have felt better than knowing I had to wait longer. At that point, what little composure I was hanging onto left and I started crying and moaning. I discovered that by moaning, I could focus on that and not the pain so much, so I layed there and moaned just like I was having a baby (Only I never really moaned when I was delivering my kids. Childbirth was nothing compared to this pain.)

When the doctor showed up, I was on my hands and knees (not an easy postion to get into on one of those little cots, with an IV in your hand, and a fuzzy head from morphine). This doc was VERY sweet, ask me as few questions as possible and got me some medication for the pain. If you have not already guessed, she thought I was passing a kidney stone. They gave me of all things Motrin 800 through the IV and within three minutes my pain was almost gone. When the doctor came back, she joked with me that is was my postion that gave the diagnosis away. Aparently I was not the first kidney stone victim that she saw the backside of before seeing their face.

I will save you anymore gory details, but today I am much better. I have to strain my urine for a week and save the sludge to take to my doctor to be sure it passes I guess. So far, only one person has acidently peed into my toilet hat, but I am sure it will be fine.

Anyone else want to share their most painful experiences? I would love to hear how you handled it.

This morning I finally got my coffee, and had a much more normal morning. My resident ended up being admitted, so please remember him in your prayers.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

One more down, and I'm not talking football..............

Yesterday I was able to pay off my student loan. Might not sound like much to those of you without debt, but it is a huge deal with me. It also means we only have one more loan to pay off. (note: I am not counting the credit cards that are in debt consolidation, though they are down from a starting count of fourteen accounts to six, and will be down to five in December.) As soon as (my) Mister gets approved for his term life insurance, we will be able to cancel his (according to Dave Ramsey,) rip-off whole life policy. That policy has a cash value of about eight thousand dollars so we will be able to pay off that last loan, and only have monthly utility/maintenance payments and our mortgage. It has been THIRTY-ONE years since I have been able to make that claim. Do you believe that? About one hundred and thirty thousand dollars paid off in two and one half years! WOW! (And totally ridiculous that we got that deep in debt in the first place!)

I am putting that in writing so you know it can be done. If you are drowning in debt you can learn how to swim against the tide and save yourself. I tell you this because I too know the feeling of being overwhelmed by bills, and stuggling to get a grip on money instead of simply watching it slip through my fingers month after month, on its way to a bill collector. It's these feelings that I really want to talk about in this post.

Yesterday, after making the last student loan payment, one would think I would be jumping with joy. How did I react? I was so happy, that I just started sobbing. Poor Mister, he didn't know what to make of it all. Through out the evening, as I would share the good news with someone, the tears would well up again and again. What was really going on?

Like I have shared before, Money has always been a concern in my life. I always managed to pay my bills, but not without great stress month after month, year after year. Constantly looking for ways to cut corners, and stretch those dollars takes its toll on a person. Crying yesterday was a cleansing of sorts, finally being able to know that those stressful times are behind me. Everytime things got tight, I would put that stupid student loan on deferment (because I could) so that I could pay something else, or be able to feed the kids. Everytime I had to defere that loan, it pushed the payoff date back and increased the amount I would be paying because. Of course, though I could put off the payments the interest continued to rack up, but what could I do? I couldn't worry about the interest when I turning over couch cushions to find change for school lunches.

To never have to concern myself with having to make those choices again is the best gift I could ever get. Bonus... Having that monthly payment in my pocket rather than out the door every month opens up a world of possibilities.

The tears came from relief. I feel as if the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders. I wish everyone could feel the joy that I am feeling as these finacial stresses leave my life. If you are feeling hopeless and overwhelmed about money, I want to encourage you to decide today to let those feelings go and look for concrete ways to change things. If you are reading this, then you most likely have a computer and can tune into Dave Ramsey. He has tons of good advice, but he also has the goal of giving people hope of a debt free lifestyle. He makes his listeners laugh, and he also makes them mad. Anyone that cares more about helping people than about how they feel about him personally gets my vote. Check him out for a few weeks. Not only will he grow on you, his ideas will change your life if you decide to utilize them.

In case you are wondering... Though it might sound like it, this is not an paid advertisment for Dave. Listening to him has done so much for our family, I want to be able to share the peace he teaches with all of you.
Weird, weirder, weirdest...............

This tag, compliments of Has to be me, is to list weird things about myself. Those that know me personally, could probably generate a long, long list in a very short period of time. Since my weirdness is also my normal, I might overlook a thing or two. Feel free to add to my list in the comment section. Here goes:


I'm thinking.... (Weird... How about... No! Maybe... Wait!) I know...

I talk to myself! No, I mean it. I constantly have conversations with myself. You say everyone does that? Okay, so maybe my weirdness comes in under the fact that I actually enjoy these conversations, find them beneficial, and think of myself as good company. Weird, I know.

I ABSOLUTELY refuse to allow my family to "love me more." When they say they love me, I reply, "I love you more." Once in a while one of my children will try to say, "I love you more." They get the "I am the mother, blah, blah, blah, so I love you more speech." My oldest has even managed to slip the words into the end of a phone conversation and then hang up quickly. I HAD to call her back to set her straight on who loves who more. Is this weird, or simply a mother's due?

In times of real crisis, I am cool as a cucumber. When little things go wrong my response is much more dramatic. Someone passes out, call 911, hand over paperwork, assist as needed. Someone cuts themself, "WHAT! I have to stop what I am doing to find you a bandaide? Get blood on the rug and I will kill you. Now you are going to try and get out of all your jobs around the house because your injured right?" Alright, even I think this one is a little out there.

I have a sick fasination about (my) Mister's former romantic relationships. I am sure this stems from some deep-seeded insecurity, but when I listen to him telling me how so and so did such and such, I always feel like the way we are together is far superior. Weird AND condensending.

Speaking about fasinations, I also have one about people's poop, not just mine. I totally blame this one on my job, plus I have read tons of information about how to "read" poop to determine the health of a person. My family thinks it is just gross when they are helping me toilet someone and I won't flush until I look at it. How else am I suppose to document the size and consistency? (If you are not in the health field, trust me, it HAS to be documented.) My family has kind of gotten used to the poop discusions I have with them to gage there level of health and wellness. Poop patterns really are a great indication of someone's level of wellness, weird as it might sound.

Now some things that might be deemed weird, but not very:

In order to relax, I have to have things around me neat, tidy, and organized.

I have food cycles when all I eat is the same thing for a week in a row, and then I don't eat that food again for months.

I celebrate my pets birthdays.

I also talk to them like they are people. (and answer for them as well.)

I play games with things that drive me nuts. For example, when my youngest leaves something laying around I try and see how long I can ignore it and let it lay there before telling her to pick it up, to see 1. if she will notice, and pick it up on her own (rarely, if ever happens) and/or 2. how long I can stand having something out of place. (I think of it as character/tolorance building. The shortest length of time would be just after the item has come to rest on a surface, and the longest was probably about two days... I was proud of that one!)

I cry harder, longer, and with more emotion when I am happy about something than when I am upset about something. I will fill you in on more about this one in tomorrows post, but for now I need to put away my weirdness and get on with my day.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Can't believe I didn't buy any...............

Remember how I love shoes, especially when I get a good deal? Well, the latest offer I received in the mail was for a free suede hobo bag (a purse for you guys out there reading this) with a fifty dollar purchase. The offer started Thursday, but we had to wait for (my) Mister to get home Sunday for us to check it out. I called the store to make sure they still had them before we headed over. You know as well as I do that when you see the words "supply is limited" it could mean they START out with only one or two.

Since (my) Mister needed new shoes I knew we would spend the money to get the bag, so we took care of that first, and when I took the shoes to the counter I ended up getting the last bag. Talk about timing. After taking care of business, I headed to the clearance racks to have some fun.

I found out (after the fact) that I did not like the style of the latest summer shoes. Actually, they reminded me of what I used to wear back in high school. I did find these really, really, really, cool suede sandals that had little gold shoe charms across the front of the shoe. They were wonderful, but at half off they were still fifty dollars. What kind of a deal is that? We tried a few other styles on, but our heart was not in it so we left... SHOELESS! That is definitely a first for us. Before we did though, I put a little hex on the sandals so no one else will want to buy them, and they will still be there waiting for us (marked significantly down) the next time we go. I'll show you how cute they are when I get them.

Monday, October 09, 2006


Introducing my grand-dog..............

Isn't he adorable? His mom says he HATES his coat, but it makes him look like such a little man. Ilove it. Posted by Picasa

Sunday, October 08, 2006

"MY DAY" in review.....................

So another year begins, full of promise and hope. Before it does, allow me one more look back to fill those of you in that missed the actual activities of the day.

One of the ways that (my) Mister spoils me is to have the coffee ready in the morning so I just have to push the button and start it. With him gone on his little camping vacation, I have been having to make the coffee myself. I know, life is tough! Anyway, I had decided that I was going to drink tea yesterday ( I am finding it hard to really enjoy black coffee. I miss half and half!)and use the cold, day old coffee if anyone HAD to have coffee instead of tea. I came into the kitchen and noticed a note on the coffee pot. It was from my youngest and it said, "Happy Birthday Mommy. I think I did it right, but you might want to check. :)Love, _____." Wasn't that the sweetest surprise?

About a half hour later I received a phone call from my oldest, over achieving, daughter. She wanted to be the first to actually speak to me on my birthday, and was happy to hear she won. Considering her own coffee pot has broken earlier in the week, and like her mother she is searching for the best deal before getting a new one, I give her extra points for getting out of bed on a Saturday morning and doing her daughterly duty coffee free!

About a week and a half ago, I received her present in the mail, so I finally got to open it over the phone. She got me not one, but two pair of running gloves. One for fall, and one for winter to keep my hands toasty warm during training. The best part of that present, was I just told her what I wanted and she did all the research and comparing and the gloves just showed up on my doorstep. How cool is that?

My son showed up mid-morning to give me the gift of yard work. I am one of those horrible people that want gifts of time and effort rather than purchased presents. He carried all of my monster plants back inside (we could be getting a killer frost any day now), and that made me feel really good. (my) Mister will be pleased with this present as well, as it will save his back from having to do it.

My next surprise came in with the mail. My grand-dog sent me an adorable card with a ten times more adorable picture of himself in it. If I get motivated, I will post it so you can see the family resemblance. There was also a card from (my) Mister! (NOTE: He had called earlier and tried to sing happy birthday to me, but mean wife that I am, I made him stop as it was hurting my ears... Don't be mad honey!) I don't know why this touched me so much, but it did. It never even occured to me that he would put a card in the mail, thinking to time it to reach me on "the day" and everything. It made me feel like the most special person in the world. Take it from me, phone calls are nice, e-mails okay, but there is nothing like getting a card or letter the old fashion way, and being able to hold it in your hand and read it over, and over, and over. Send someone you love some snail mail and see if they don't agree with me.

Another of my little birthday treats was a really good Ghost Whisper episode (taped on Friday night) that I was able to watch with only a couple of interuptions. This might not seem like a big deal to some of you, but most days I swear I am changing my name to Jack (as in "in the box") because I have to jump up and down every few minutes to tend to the needs of the OPs. I really enjoyed getting all wrapped up in the show from start to finish, comercial free!

Enough birthday tales... Time to get on with today, this year, and all of the surprises it has in store for all of us! Get excited, I know it is going to be a great year!

Friday, October 06, 2006

You are headed in the right direction. Trust your instincts.............

That was what my fortune read, last Sunday, when we got Chinese take-out. Here it is almost a week later, and I still have it. That is because I want to believe the sentiment is true. Don't we all want to think where we are heading is the right direction? But how can we be sure until we actually arrive at our destination?

I think this is where the instinct part comes in. The more time we can devote to getting to know ourselves, and practice listening to our inner voice, the more we will be able to discern whether or not we are on the right path. My insticts communicates with me a lot through my gut. Have you ever said or done something, and then a few minutes later notice that your stomach is "talking" to you? That usually means that something needs to be changed up a bit. On the opposite end of the spectrum, if after doing or saying something I get a feeling of total calm and well being, I know that it was a good thing to have said or done.

To totally change the subject.................

When my kids were little and their birthdays were approaching, I would always tell them they needed to hurry up and do anything they wanted to at their present age, as they would never be able to do whatever as a whatever year old again. Well...

Tomorrow is my birthday (number forty-nine) so today is devoted to doing all those things I ever wanted to do as a forty-eight year old. When I sign off, I will be able to cross off one more blog as a forty-eight year old. I have already told two of the four people in my inner family circle that I love them (but may be able to fit this in a couple more times today), and I have a work-out planned for later today. That pretty much takes care of my list. My needs are simple, and I am actually looking forward to moving closer towards fifty. This coming year has the promise of getting out of debt, reaching my training goals, and being ready for next year's marathon goal. It also has the promise of continuing loving relationships, as well as personal growth and development. Who knows... This could be my best year ever! Get excited for me. Anyone out there share my birthday with me besides Andy? Happy birthday to you Andy, and anyone else that the sentiment applies to.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Oh chosen one...........................

That would be me, chosen by One4jc to do a tag. They say lots of things come in threes. Let's see if I can come up with a list of them...

3 Smells I love:
A newborn baby (and/or puppy)
Romeo Gigli (my signiture French parfume)

3 Smells I hate:
Liver and onions cooking
Dentist office (even though my dentist is a really great guy!)
Cadaver Lab ( the Vicks under the nose trick really works to block the smell!)

3 Jobs that I have had in my life:
Being a mom (favorite)
Being a caregiver (second favorite)
Physical therapist assistant (Good training to enhance the other two.)

3 Movies that I could watch over and over:
Life is Beautiful
The Ref
Terms of Endearment (I only get to pick three?)

3 Fond memories:
The birth days of my children
(my) Mister's and my wedding day
Crossing the finish line of my first half-marathon

3 Jobs I would love to have:
My current job (I guess this makes me lucky.)
Director of my dream nursing home
Writer (that has been published and is known on a larger scale than blogging.)

3 Places that I have lived:
College dorm

3 Things I like to do:
Be (again, it was hard to pick only three)

3 Of my favorite foods:
Dried Turkish Figs
Fresh picked tomotoes
Any type of green salad that SOMEONE else has made (Note: These are this weeks
favorites, and subject to change from week to week.)

3 Places I would like to be right now:
Right where I am
With my family all around me
At a higher level of spiritual growth

3 Websites that I visit daily:
There are honestly NO websites I visit daily. The ones I visit most frequently:
My credit union web site
Carnival Cruise line (currently planning my next vacation)
On-line sites for bill paying

3 Things that make me cry:

3 Friends that I am tagging: (The new chosen ones!)
Has to be me

Have fun with the take ladies!

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Times a wastin..............................

Or else I'm just wasting time! For having only three residents to care for, it seems that I should have all kinds of free time, and yet it was almost two thirty yesterday afternoon before I sat down to eat lunch. So what am I doing with all my time? Mmmmmm...

Having time to look around my house, added to the fact that we have a new open space, has put me into a purge mode. I seem to walk into a room and the next thing I know I am rearranging something, taking something off the wall, or a shelf. After having extra furniture squished into my look at room (everyone else calls this a living room, but this is the room that is suppose to be nice for company, thus looked at, not lived in.) I may be taking the sparse look a bit to far. I have this insane desire to throw everything out (well not in the trash, but toss it towards new homes) I cleared away a bunch of knick knacks, and when (my) Mister came home I had him moving pictures. Poor guy!

For the past two years I have looked at this stupid black cord stretching along the wall from the stereo, round the corner, and propped up on the fridge to pull in the satelite signal. It finally occured to me to move the stereo cabinet across the room and access the window to pull in the signal. NO BLACK CORD staring me in the face anymore! My question is why did it take me so long to look for a solution rather than spend tons of energy to not be bothered by the problem in the first place? Am I the only one that does this? I think not.

For the sake of confidentiality, I will refer to this twenty something as Miss X. Miss X cracks me up, and reminds me so much of me when I was that age. I tell her she missed her calling as a stand up comic, when she comes over and replays the current problem in her life. One day, it was about getting in the wrong line when signing up for classes. If only I could have bottled the energy she used up getting all upset in the first place, and then reliving it over and over again, I could have started my own power plant. I know she thinks I am the crazy one when I tell her repeatedly that the struggles she has today are preparing her for tomorrow, but I kinda think she is listening.

What is the current black cord, sucking the life energy out of you? Decided, today to problem solve so you can find the proper place for it, and thus reduce your energy drain. Then go out and use that extra energy and have some real fun. Enjoy!

Monday, October 02, 2006

A productive weekend (if one doesn't include blogging that is.)...............

As you can see in the above pictures, we finished the new room (except for the trim) and I finished (my) Mister's sweater. I LOVE the way both turned out. It is hard to believe that just two short months ago, the far end of the room was a screened porch, and the sweater was a bunch of balls of yarn. Amazing what one can do in a short amount of time, isn't it? Bonus, we paid for the new construction as we went, so we can enjoy the extra space without extra debt. I am very proud of that, so thanks for letting me brag! What do you think of my new things? Posted by Picasa