The latest in "wanting it all".......................

I try hard not to get to political on this blog, because I really do believe that everyone has a right to do what they want to do, as long as they are not doing anybody else harm.

Having said that I MUST speak to something I heard on the Today Show.

They did a segment about a trend that is happening in which moms that are too busy to nurse their babies are paying other women to do the job for them. They actually call it outsource nursing! Are they nuts?

Okay! I nursed my baby. Once (and only one time) I even nursed a friend's baby when he refused to take a bottle and wouldn't stop screaming, but this was an emergency situation I felt(and prior to this time she and I had talked about this so I sorta had her permission).

I agree that breast milk is the perfect food for an infant, and there are many benefits to nursing (for me the number one was convenience. It was faster than fixing and warming a bottle), but these benefits become liabilities (in my opinion) when another woman is supplying the breast milk long term.

Lots of things pass through breast milk. Yes, they screen the wet nurses, but do they do this prior to every feeding? What if the wet nurse decides to binge drink one night after they pass screening? Or eat something that makes baby gassy? Or need to go on pain killers and baby doesn't latch onto the fill-in wet nurse? Or...Fill in the blank.

Lots of studies have been done about the bonding that takes place during the nursing experience. Is it really okay with these moms that this happens with someone else besides them? If it is good to breastfeed to create this bond, is is beneficial then to create a bond that will be broken around age two when nursing stops? Is it beneficial for the WN to try to supply the breast milk without creating the bond? Would that be possible? Is there enough benefit to breast milk (and not the act of breast feeding) to justify the potential separation anxiety and possible long term bonding issues when the relationships ends once baby is weened?

Millions of babies have grown up on formula and in fact done quite well. As much as we try to kid ourselves we cannot have it all. Why do we even think we need to have it all? All (again in my opinion) is one of those words in the same category as never and always. The more one strives to fulfill their meaning of these words, the more they desire and rarely does satisfaction ever arrive. How will these women feel ten years from now in the event that this new trend turns out not to be such a good idea? One can strive all they want and not change the past. The point will come when peace must be made with a choice. Might it not be better to get this out of the way the first year of the kid's life and then move on? Just a thought?

Do I think that these mother's don't care about their babies welfare and are only out for themselves and their best interest? Of course not. I am sure in their minds these mothers are making a good choice for their child. Who am I to say that my way is the only right way? Who am I to make judgements about the way other people raise their kids? I sure didn't want anyone telling me how to raise mine. But are these mom's best intentions going to create worse case scenarios down the road? How do we tell before it is too late?

And now it is your turn. Let me know what you think of this idea. Has anyone reading actually done this practice or know someone that has done it and been happy with it? I really would like to hear other thoughts on the subject. Not so we can choose sides and get into a big debate, but so I might understand the other point of view, because right now, I just don't get it!