Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Out of the mouth of babes (not to be confused with the classic, sexy blond)..........


Dee sent the following to me this morning. I couldn't resist sharing it with the rest of you, along with some comments of my own...



HOW DO YOU DECIDE WHO TO MARRY? (written by kids)

(1) You got to find somebody who likes the same stuff. Like, if you like
sports, she should like it that you like sports, and she should keep the
chips and dip coming.
- Alan, age 10

Or if she likes sports he should be happy to take over OP care so she can do her long runs and go on race vacations whenever she wants to.

(2) No person really decides before they grow up who they're going to marry.

God decides it all way before, and you get to find out later who you're
stuck with.
- Kristen, age 10

But after you get unstuck of the loser(s), and decide you deserve to be with a nice guy, there will be one just waiting in the wings for your enjoyment.


WHAT IS THE RIGHT AGE TO GET MARRIED?

(1) Twenty-three is the best age because you know the person FOREVER by
then.
- Camille, age 10

When it comes to many marriages these days FOREVER has been encapsulated into periods much shorter than twenty-three years thanks to no-fault divorce. Too sad.

(2) No age is good to get married at. You got to be a fool to get married.
- Freddie, age 6 (very wise for his age)

For sure a fool... My favorite kind of fool... One that is in love


HOW CAN A STRANGER TELL IF TWO PEOPLE ARE MARRIED?

(1) You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at
the same kids.
- Derrick, age 8

This one is perfection. The only thing I might add is in addition to yelling at the same kids, they are NOT speaking to one another.


WHAT DO YOU THINK YOUR MOM AND DAD HAVE IN COMMON?

(1) Both don't want any more kids.
- Lori, age 8

Can't touch that!


WHAT DO MOST PEOPLE DO ON A DATE?

(1) Dates are for having fun, and people should use them to get to know
each other. Even boys have something to say if you listen long enough.
- Lynnette, age 8 (isn't she a treasure)

The one and only "date" I went on with (my) Mister was a disaster. He is much more relaxed and talkative when we are just hanging out at home. Good thing I never cared much for dating.

(2) On the first date, they just tell each other lies and that Usually gets
them interested enough to go for a second date.
- Martin, age 10 (Who said boys do not have brains)

Not sure whether to laugh or cry at this one. Actually what happen was I laughed until I cried on the first read through.

WHAT WOULD YOU DO ON A FIRST DATE THAT WAS TURNING SOUR?

(1) I'd run home and play dead. The next day I would call all the newspapers
and make sure they wrote about me in all the dead columns.
-Craig, age 9
Sad, but true, this is what many people do when their marriage goes sour. They make themselves numb to the hurt and pain and stay together long after they should for a variety of reasons. I believe it is never too late to change your mind and fix things (note: I said YOUR mind, NOT the other person's, and "fixing things" can take on a variety of forms).

WHEN IS IT OKAY TO KISS SOMEONE?

(1) When they're rich.
- Pam, age 7 (I could not have said it better myself)

Also, when they are under three and over eighty.

(2) The law says you have to be eighteen, so I wouldn't want to mess with
that.
- Curt, age 7 (Good Point)

This rule must be where the saying, "sixteen and never been kissed" comes from.

(3 ) The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone, then you should marry
them and have kids with them. It's the right thing to do.
- Howard, age 8 (Who made the rule)

True confessions... I kissed my first boy when I was five years old (Even at a very young age I have NEVER been able to turn down a dare). Does the fact that I went on to marry others make me a loose woman???

IS IT BETTER TO BE SINGLE OR MARRIED?

It's better for girls to be single but not for boys. Boys need someone to
clean up after them.
- Anita, age 9 (bless you child)
This is SO true! Single women just have to ask their boyfriends to do things for them and the guy can't resist rescuing (the Rapunzel complex) her by helping. Once married some guys feel like they have done the ultimate rescue and the wife is left on her own with the mundane day-to-day chores. MUST NOTE: My guy helps out around the house all the time. I think I am the one in this relationship with the Rapunzel complex...

HOW WOULD THE WORLD BE DIFFERENT IF PEOPLE DIDN'T GET MARRIED?

(1 ) There sure would be a lot of kids to explain, wouldn't there?
- Kelvin, age 8

Sad to say but I believe relationships would take on a different/better quality if the legal aspect were removed. No fighting over a divorce. Partnerships would have to be worked out as they move along without the fairytale of happily ever after pre-programed in us. If there were no marriage for anyone, same-sex relationships would finally be on an even footing and people would be free to partner with another to share expenses, medical (and other)benefits, tax breaks. Marriage can be (and currently is for me) a really great thing, but it will never be the end all and be all of relationships; Love will never be able to be pigeoned-holed that easily.

And the #1 Favourite is........


HOW WOULD YOU MAKE A MARRIAGE WORK?

(1 ) Tell your wife that she looks pretty, even if she looks like a truck.
- Ricky, age 10 ( The boy already understands)

2) Tell your wife she is the sexiest cook you have ever known (even if she can't boil water)

3) Always say, "I love you" and give her two compliments before telling her what is really on your mind. If nothing else, over time, it will give a heads up that something is up and she can get a jump start on preparing her defense.

4) Learn to appreciate her interests, if only from the aspect that most of them she will prefer to do with her girlfriends instead of you, leaving you plenty of free time to do what you want to do.

5) Invite her into your world to share in your interests, and resist the urge to try and figure out how she can, no matter the topic, always manage to relate it to shoes (when we go fishing I will need new water shoes for my outfit... when I hold the light over the engine promise you won't drip oil on my shoes... Could you write me a computer program that would automatically take me to all my shoe web sites?)

AND FOR THE GALS.............................

1) It is fine to refer to his parts in a descriptive manner (rock-hard biceps), even name then (Rocky mountain arms), but stay away from sizing things. As "cute" as we think it is he just WON'T appreciate it in any manner or form, (not even if it is a VERY favorable size) and will not be able to help himself from entering into the "comparison conversation" and nothing good has ever been spun out of that one.

2) Early in the relationship try out terms like, "cute, handsome, and stud," to find out which one makes his ears perk up. File this information for those times he seems to have gone totally deaf to you, and can only hear the television set.

3) Always say "I love you" and give him two compliments before telling him what is really on your mind. If nothing else, over time, it will give him a heads up that something is up and he can get a jump start on preparing his defense.

4) If you want your partner to help around the house make sure you can say something positive about the outcome, especially if it didn't come out the way you thought it would.

5) Face it, no matter how much he says he doesn't mind spending hours standing in the shoe store while you look around, it would be better for your marriage in the long run to send him to the book store or sporting goods store while you browse, and meet up for coffee at a pre-appointed time.

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